Confessions …

 …. of an agnostic theist.

• People often confuse you with an atheist. Correction, I am NOT an atheist. I believe in a God. I just don’t think it’s really certain who or what exactly God is. And it’s uphill work, I’m trying to figure out. But seriously. Lay off the hateful spam eh?
• People often like to shudder and call you blasphemous. And when you tell them “All great truths begin in blasphemy” they think of you things even worse than before. And pray for your ‘hidayat’.
• Fall-outs don’t always turn into pleasant, intellectual debates. They often end up in name-calling, ironic as that may seem to the idea that arguing about religion, is supposed to be intellectually stimulating.
• Believe it or not, I don’t like to flaunt around that I’m an agnostic theist nor do I use it as a conversation piece. I still live in the real world where Mom and Dad pray five times a day and I’m always grilled on how many times I pray myself by various members of my family. So my faith is strongly personal and this poor blog is the main source of all my vents.
• Agnostic theism does NOT define who I am as a person. It’s a part of my attitudes and opinions to life-situations but it definitely does NOT mean all my t-shirts have “God is Dead” written on them.

…. of an unashamed Potterhead.

• I’ve read the Potter books no less than five hundred times. Back to back.
• I had the first couple of movies memorized.
• I had a major, major, MAJOR crush on Daniel Radcliffe. When he was 13. And I was 18. Don’t tell his parents.
• I used to drink Pineapple Tang and eat Chips Ahoy! with it, every morning, during some school/college break and read a portion of the book everyday. 9 a.m. in fact. The house would still be quiet and the morning fresh air was still there. Good times.
• I’ve got dozens of Harry scrapbooks and other related goofy stuff.
• I’d have loved to audition for one of the roles.
• I’m officially an HP geek.

… of a Pakistani expat in Yemen.

• I miss everything  about Pakistan. I miss my boring and irritating relatives and I miss being able to talk to random strangers in Urdu.
• I miss bakery ke samosay, pakoray, dahi bhallay, chana papri, sev puris, bhuttays/challis, paan, chalia, taftan, sheermals, kulfi, falooday, haleem, 10 rupay wali ice cream cone, goofy eid ads (Gaye Soap, sabonon main TOAP!), mehndi, falsay, jaamuns, biryani, tikkay, jelebis, cham chams, steaks, Zouk, Cafe Coffee Day, bookshops, books ke thailay, chinese food, cinemas, freely-dressed women, designer wear, Body Shop, McDonalds, job opportunities for psychologists, family, friends ….
• Can’t wait to go back.
• Can’t understand people who live abroad all their lives.
• Have already asked Mom to bring a truckload of stuff when she visits here next week.

… of a movie-critic.

• People are smarter than just eye-candy-gobblers.
• Cliches can be, believe it or not, boring.
• Cliches can be, believe it or not, cute.
• Zac Efron does not equal cuteness.
• Action flicks need to be more like Bourne Series.
• Animated flicks need to be more like Shrek series.
• Rom-com flicks need to stop focusing on boobs and start stressing on stories.
• More movies like “Charlie Wilson’s War” need to be popular with the public.
• “Antichrist” is a stupid way for a director to state he’s got horseshit for brains.

… of a blogger.

• I hate bloggers who blog for traffic. I really wonder sometimes if people would blog if they knew no one’s reading. Having said that, it’s great to have feedback and as long as traffic isn’t the whole, sole reason you’re blogging, enjoy the fad!
• Majority of the Pakistani blogosphere is, sadly, obsessed with traffic. But it’s better than being obsessed with something like Britney Spears, I’d say.
• Blog searches really freak me out sometimes.
• I write here when I’m unbelievably piqued or considerably stressed. Which is why I often sound Type A to myself when I write here.
• Creepy spammers who like to take a shot at my blog’s content are not welcome. It’s one thing to call me a retard it’s quite completely another to add expletives within that one word and make it completely original just for my benefit. Next time, raid a porn site or something.
• I’ve made just as many real friends from the blog-world as I’ve made (thank God virtual) enemies, so I guess the battle’s in my favor. Huh.

… of a writer.

• I write all the time. In my head.
• Mainstream journalism was an opportunity I willingly gave up because I’d seen my father’s not-too-wonderful fate in being honest and not much of a moolah-oriented Urdu journalist.
• I make up small sketches about people I interact with. All the time. Watch out.
• Writing is often a purging experience for me. And a lot of times, that experience isn’t public because I know I’d shock a few people. And I like doing that only in so many cases.

… of a friend.

• If you call yourself my friend you need to tolerate me and my sad-ass opinions even though you don’t agree.
• And if you don’t agree have the balls to speak up.
• I don’t confess it often but I like being told I’m doing an okay job at whatever I’m doing. It’s a weakness but everyone needs encouragement once in a leap year anyway.

… of a wife.

• It does NOT matter what the world says about women who have maids. Housekeeping is STILL taxing.
• It drives me crazy not to know what to cook the next day.
• Differences don’t matter. Really. They don’t.
• Sports channels should have a parental control thingamajigs.

… of a woman living in the 21st century.

• I cannot start my day properly if I can’t check my email in the morning.
• I am in love with the new Nokia N97. 1000 fucking dollars. AGH.
• I think with all this technology in the world, we should certainly be able to learn how to live peacefully with each other by now.

 

(Disclaimer: I got the idea of this post from Savage Garden’s Affirmation. Consider this a tag, all  ye who read.)